Friday, 28 December 2012

Still Being Insane

I know this is so not a post Christmas type post but I need to upload a bunch of pictures and then I'll provide you with the obligatory holiday recap.

As for my Insanity endeavor I'd say I'm doing pretty well considering the copious amount of butter and sugar and fat laden goods begging to be eaten. (and I'm relenting!)  I successfully completed each of the workouts for week two last week.   Towards the end of the week I noticed that my energy has noticeably improved as well as my general mood.  I'm sure the joy of Christmas also helped but feeling less fatigue sure makes for a happier Carla.

The food part has naturally been very difficult and from the 24th-26th calorie counting was a useless venture.  If I had I likely would have gone into a deep depression over the totals!

After taking four days off I got back into the workout regime yesterday - with the fit test.   I pushed hard and there was a little improvement from two and half weeks ago when I began.  I also think I might be down one pound despite all, but I hesitate to go confirm/disprove that.  Heck, I'm nervous to even type it! 

So I plug along now  until after January 1 and then I will attempt hit this hard core and see where it leads!

Friday, 21 December 2012

Preparing Sierra

So the Mayan calendar failed, the world is not over.  
Huh, go figure.

Onward to vamping up the Christmas season excitement.  Sierra gets so over the top that I had to devise a plan of action for survival purposes.  Today I told her that in a few days, to start off Christmas, we are going to church followed by Oma's for presents, on which day she will be told a half hour before we leave for church that it is the day.   I also told her that a few days later we will open our presents at home Christmas morning.  I'm not sure we'll be able to keep up the second deception but if we can it will be for all our own good.  Trust me.  The girl gets insane with excitement; she doesn't sleep, eat well and gets a tummy ache, then the weeping and unreasonableness set it. 
 Not. Fun.

Anyway,  I played a little with my iPhone camera because it's easier to post pictures that way.

For a number of years in a row an aunt and uncle of mine thought I needed angels, now I have my own chorus of angels.

The nativity we purchased for our first Christmas.

The one thing Trevor insists we have every Christmas.

I discovered that Sierra was playing with my phone camera!

1.Very blurry tree.

2. A bit better.


3. Ahhh!  There we go. ( Don't you love the mess?)

I may not manage another post before Christmas so Merry Christmas everyone!

Tuesday, 18 December 2012

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

I drove home from work today and distinctly thought, "life is good!"

Here's why:

I feel rested.
I'm exercising regularly again.
Christmas is coming.
I'm pretty much ready for Christmas.
My kids are awesome.
My husband is awesome.
My parents are fantastic.
I have some pretty great friends too.
I really, really like my job these days.  
I like that I work outside the home part-time rather than full time. 
That being said I'm looking forward to a day at home tomorrow, just me and Sawyer.
I bought some new caramel coloured boots yesterday.  On sale and with a gift card so my cost was minimal.
Snow is in the forecast this week.

Life is good.

Sunday, 16 December 2012

Insanity - the beginning, again.

After once again realizing what sleep is and with that the return of feeling human I took a look in the mirror, at how my clothes are fitting and the got on the scale.  Yup, time to reign in the excuses and get back on track.  Now it's only two to three pounds that have wormed their way back but two or three more and I'm back where I was.

It boggles my mind how easily I slipped into basically doing nothing from an avid 5-6 days a week of exercise. And how it became my norm.  I followed reasonable eating off and on but activity became non-existent.  It began with Sawyer deciding naps were no longer needed.  The adjustment took more than one would think and it messed up my routine and I've struggled with creating a new one.  Then the colds and extreme bouts of sleep deprivation began in the middle of September and continued until near the end of November.  Life became about survival and lots of caffeine!

 Just over a week ago I realized that my clothes are becoming a little tighter; the tugging is beginning again.  I scowled at the scale number and decided now was the time to get back into it.  Why wait until the New Year when I can start now?

 With the type of food and eating that comes with the Christmas season that part is proving to be extremely hard to reign in.  With watching the calorie count I can still plan for it and 'partake' without feeling too guilty.  The fact of the matter is, food is buttery, sugary, fatty deliciousness - and plenty of it! - this time of year and to deny myself is wrong on many levels.  So I attempt moderation and control.

Monday was a gong show so no workout occurred but I stayed within my calorie plan and with healthy food.

Tuesday my food intake was within the allowed, barely, but the pizza for supper wasn't that great on the healthy scale. 
Nor were the 1 1/2 subway cookies.  Or the small piece of birthday cake
(it is Trevor's birthday and although the main celebration was over the weekend we had to at least have cake!).

The rest of the week was about the same - quality wasn't great but quantity okay.

I did my first insanity workout in months on Monday and yikes, felt totally out of shape again.  Not as bad as when I started the first time but still!  I was appalled at how the body just reverts back to it's flabby, wimpy, gasping self.   As the week and workouts wore on, I was impressed at how quickly my body jumped into action, literally.  I had limited soreness and fatigue and the was able to sweat through the workouts without wanting to die.  My former determination was renewed and has came back fully and I'm motivated to complete this again.

I wish to eliminate a total of 9 pounds (4 that I gained back plus 5 more).  The first four will make me happy, the next five are just something to aim for and would thrill me to the core.  I'll see what I'm willing and motivated to do.

Tuesday, 11 December 2012


Here are some fun photos of me pulling Sierra's third baby tooth recently.

The slippery little tooth was hard to grab!
Here goes....
Got it!

Friday, 7 December 2012

A Snapshot of a Typical Morning

Sometime in the middle of the night (4:28A.M. I think) a gentle 'pat pat' drags me out of slumber-land and into a groggy state of consciousness.  I reach out and touch the head of the offender to determine which kid it is before reluctantly rolling out from beneath my warm blankets.  It is Sawyer so I scoop him up in my arms to carry him back to his bed only to discover he has wet himself.  Nice.  Now my PJ's are also damp.  Gross. I quickly put him down, change both of us, put him back in bed and lay down with him.  I doze off beside my cute little boy and an hour later crawl back into my own, cold side of the bed. 
6:45A.M. Trevors alarm goes off.  I roll over and ignore it.

7:15A.M. Sierra comes bounding in and onto the bed, and me.  I wake up. Kinda hard not to.
It's a school Friday for her (she only goes on Friday once every three weeks) so I can't lay around in bed.  OK, OK, I rarely am allowed to lay around in bed thanks to my kids but there's always hoping!  I quickly dress in something warm and comfy and yawn my way into the kitchen.

First stop coffee.  
A third of a cup comes out.  
Obviously there were not enough beans ground because Trevor always makes a full pot. (he doesn't grind more because the grinder is loud and he doesn't want to wake the kids any sooner than they need to be up)  I take my meager cup of coffee anyway, better than none for now!
Next stop: breakfast - Golden Grahams cereal because I'm too lazy to make anything else.

7:24 Sierra asks if she can play on the computer so I tell if she gets dressed and is ready for school she may.  She 'needs' help choosing her clothes.  I comply rather than argue even though it is silly since all I do is pull out options and she says yes or no and wears what she wants anyway!

7:30 Sierra plays on the computer, I peruse Facebook on my iPhone. 

7:43 I give Sierra three fruit options for her to take for a snack this morning and she actually chooses one quickly and without argument!  Grapes.  Easy.  Done.

7:47 I check the weather.  
-14 degrees Celsius (7 degrees Fahrenheit)
All right, gonna have to bundle up to walk to the bus.
I wake up and dress Sawyer.  I love how he rubs his eyes at the light in the mornings!
We all grab and put on hats, mitts, and boots.  Sierra adds snow pants to the outfit because the school policy is that they go outside for recess until -20.

7:58 we exit the warmth of the house into the cold, crisp outdoors and take the short walk to the school bus pick-up spot.  We wait for a couple of minutes before the big yellow bus snorts it's way up the street.  On goes Sierra and off to school.  Sawyer and I walk back.

8:07 Time for more coffee.  I make an eggnog latte.  Mmmmmm.
I make Sawyer toast with Nutella, he licks the excess chocolate spread off the knife,  (a dull butter knife I must add) drinks his milk, eats one or two pieces of toast and declares himself full.  He asks for Team Umizoomi on the TV.  I say sure.  I can't find the remote so I go grab the downstairs one and set up his show, leaving the remote on the couch.  I go to grab my latte and see the missing remote on the counter.  

I enjoy my latte while sitting on the couch beside Sawyer and type this post and notice the room get increasingly brighter as the sun rises.  It's very peaceful with only one child and it's not my demanding one!

9:16 I should really get on with my Friday cleaning so I can finish by noon and enjoy the rest of the day with my kids.


My messy kitchen counters.  Pretty much their state 75% of the time.
Yesterday's laundry that I don't put in the dryer so it gets to hang on the railing.
Me and my boy!

Thursday, 6 December 2012

Tough Love - Progress

Last Friday I had a meeting with Sierra's gym teacher, Mr. H, regarding her fear of gym.  I had managed to  determine, together with Sierra, that the main issue is that she does not like a few of the games they play in gym.  The games in question are 'chasing' games which she does not like.  A couple of them also involve wolves ("What time is it Mr. Wolf" and a three little pigs game) and Sierra had nightmares with wolves about a year or so ago.  Sierra enjoys all other parts of gym.  They only began playing these particular games a couple of weeks ago, exactly when she started not wanting to go to school. 

It was really good to speak with Mr. H, he was so open and understanding.  Truthfully, I was rather conflicted with this whole issue.  I struggled with trying to teach/force her to participate no matter what because, you know, that's life, and showing compassion because she is only five.  It was no easy feat for me to dig down, pull out my resolve and tell her "Too bad, you have to learn to deal with it."  I wasn't feeling good about that and that's what prompted me to see for myself what was going on and speak with Mr. H.

Mr. H shared with me that he has another female student who refused gym all last year while in kindergarten and for the first three weeks of this year, grade one, but is now participating.  He said that there is no point in Sierra not liking school just because of a few games in gym.  The poor girl was literally making herself sick and not eating. 

Our plan of action was to have one of the aides play the game(s) with Sierra off to the side, not really even part of the group.  If she still objects than she will be permitted to sit out.  As I said previously, Sierra is very much an observer and rarely will jump right into an activity no matter how fun, rather unusual for a girl her age.   Upon explaining this plan to her she seemed to be okay with school again.

It is now Thursday, Sierra has had school with gym twice this week and so far so good!  She greeted me at the end of the day Monday all excited because she got to be the wolf and do the chasing, rather than be chased.  Wednesday she came home having eaten her lunch (first time in three weeks!) and we passed Mr. H on our way out of the school and he smiled and said " she's better!"

Saturday, 1 December 2012

Parade Time!

 It was a somewhat cool and rather windy for own town's annual Christmas Light parade last Friday.
Sierra, my mom, and I bundled up and enjoyed the festivities.  Free hot chocolate and popcorn began the evening.  Then we found the perfect spot along Main Street to sit and await the beginning.  A fireworks show kicked off the delightful, colourful parade.  Christmas carols were played over speakers, everyone was happy and Santa ended the twenty-five minute long line of floats and vehicles and passed out candy bags to all the kids.

My dad has a 1972 GMC Sierra Grande that he restored that he decked out and entered in the parade.  Sawyer and Trevor rode with him as they are not so much into being outside in the cold!
It was a fun evening and a great way to put me in the Christmas spirit!

Wednesday, 28 November 2012

Tough Love

  Oh, it's been a time lately!  I had a large glass of wine on Monday.  MONDAY!!!! Then finished the bottle with Trevor yesterday.  What am I going to need by Friday?

That one time "not feeling well"/need-a-Mommy-day Sierra had turned out to not be a one time incident.  Last Sunday night she was again crying and saying she did not want to go to school.  She even came up with several 'reasons'.  She bawled all Monday morning but in the end got on the bus and went and had a great day. Tuesday she clung to me, crying, when I was dropped her and Sawyer off at the sitters, but again had a good day.  Wednesday she was up at six crying about not wanting to go to school again!  I managed to calm her and she agreed to go without crying if I drove her.  This week was basically a repeat except she went to school on Monday without a tear.  She just moped that entire evening and was miserable with me!

After weeding through all the excuses and helping out in her class this afternoon I believe I know the root of the problem.   Sierra's main concern now is gym and her gym teacher, a man, and she is not a fan of most men.  The usual flags popped up when she said this but upon speaking with Sierra I discovered her teacher hasn't actually done anything to cause this dislike, it's that he's male.  Sierra is an observer, often standing off to the side of an activity watching for awhile before joining in.  Gym requires the kids to jump in a participate.  The gym teacher said that he noticed this and has been trying to get her to engage and she may be taking exception to this?  I have an actual meeting with him on Friday. 
I sat in on her gym class and I can see her apprehension and knowing her, why.  She has to learn to deal with it, though, because although I know her fears are real to her, they are also unreasonable and if she doesn't learn to cope now than life could be tricky for her.  When she starts to cry and object to school I firmly tell her she has to go and refuse to discuss it over and over.   I literally have to turn off my heart or else it would break.

    After talking with her regular teacher I'm pretty sure there is nothing else specific going on, she's been fine until now.  I think perhaps the novelty of school and the bus has worn off and she's got it into her head that she doesn't want to go and this is the reason she's come up with.  And with me being sick and working more I also believe she is missing me; Sierra seems to have suddenly developed some sort of separation anxiety.  Whatever it is,  it's hard to deal with and I dread the approach of Monday again.
Oh, the realities of being a parent!

Friday, 16 November 2012

Mommy Day

I groggily pulled myself out of bed at 7:15 on Wednesday morning totally expecting to engage in the acts of getting Sierra ready to board the bus to school in a mere forty five minutes.  It's usually a flurry of activity and as I was mechanically making her sandwich Sierra wimpers,
"I don't want to go to school today."


That got me out of my fog pretty quick.

"Why?" I inquired.

"I don't feel very well."

"Ok," I said, a cold had been worming its way around our family but Sierra loves school so to not want to go was very unusual. "why don't you finish your toast and see how you feel."


Once her toast was finished Sierra still expressed her wish to just stay home.  She was on the verge of tears so I agreed.  Besides, it was so out of character for her.  So we had a home day, mostly hanging out and keeping things low key.  My dad even took Sawyer for an hour in the afternoon so Sierra and I could relax on the couch without having to worry about him.  
By about 3P.M she perked up and was bouncing around like usual.  

I don't know if she was actually sick or just "off" and needed a home day.
It was nice that I could comply.

Wednesday, 14 November 2012

Random Mind Spewings

Last weekend we were once again plunged into a deep freeze and inundated with snow.  Today it is sunny and warm and all melting.  Oh, and windy.  Can't forget the pesky wind.  If it's warm at this time of year its windy.  As in 60mph winds.  Bah!  Seriously, I much prefer cold and snow over wind.  Wind is noisy, and annoying and makes me cranky.  Snow is peaceful, and pretty.

We officially removed Sawyer's crib and change table from his room on Monday.
To quote Sawyer, "By bed!"
Remarkably there was no sadness or hard lump in my throat.  I have enjoyed pretty much each stage my kids have been at and I don't really long to go back because they keep getting better!
After Sawyer pooped in his diaper this morning for the first time in months so I have decided it's now time to night train him.   We DO NOT want to go backwards.  I'm lazy many morning so he stays in his diaper far too long.  Besides, we're almost out of diapers.

Cold number 3 in two months has plagued our household. 
(Cue whimpering) 
Sorry, I had to get that out.
I'd worry but I know at least three other families in the same situation and it is just a cold.  
But boy is it a mean one.
With two of my fellow employees going on maternity leave in January I am learning the eyeglass frame buying aspect of the industry.  Reps from the various manufacturers come and showcase their product and I get to help choose what frames to buy to sell to our patients.  How fun!
I'm starting to dream a little bit again.  
I pretty much stopped allowing my mind to wander beyond reality this past May when I had to accept certain facts regarding our life that I was turning a blind eye to.  I had lived so long with a particular focus and hope and when I let go of that I had nothing else.  I had clung to what I thought was God's plan for our life for too long and let it infiltrate every aspect of our lives so without it....
I've been at peace about the closed doors but haven't allowed myself to move forward with other hopes.
There is caution but once again there are dreams.
 As the joy of Christmas is surfacing and brimming with the season officially around the corner, my mood is lifting.  (it also helps that I'm getting sleep!)
I'm thinking of decorating, gift buying, parties, and good times.

Monday, 12 November 2012

It Only Took 6 Months

No. I'm not pregnant. 
We actually dismantled and moved the crib out of Sawyer's room today. The change table and rocking chair were also evicted. They will be sold because unless God intervenes in one of His miraculous ways there will be no more children for us. But that's not the point of this post.

The point is that over six months ago I began the process of making a new, modern headboard for our room. Today it finally got assembled and hung. A lot of under-the -breath curses ensued as it took way longer and was way more complicated that it should have been.  Trevor hates doing these sorts of mundane tasks.  But he's a good hubby and fortunately we both are happy with the end result.

Before (sloppily made and in natural day light)
After  (nicely made with romantic artificial evening light)

Thursday, 8 November 2012

What To Do?

(The motivation to blog every day, NaBloWriMo, ends and all of a sudden a week has passed in silence for me!)
I'm still functioning in a caffeine supported haze most days.  There hasn't been a night in the last couple of weeks where I haven't been woken up at least once by my youngest child.  It's gotten to the point where every little sound or bed movement has me in a constant state of awareness during the night so that what sleep I get isn't exactly sound.  The only saving grace right now is that we've moved Sawyer into a big bed so I just lay down with him for ten minutes or so, dozing, (if I fall asleep it's much longer!) until he's back asleep.  Relatively minimal interruption and often only once.  
By him.  
It's still interruption.
The other night Sierra also woke me up due to a bad dream.  A bin of Wii games spontaneously jumped out of a basement closet and made a huge clatter that had both Trevor and I jumping out of bed, hearts pounding.   Then Sawyer woke me up.
   Last night there were three visits and 6:30 wake up call. 
I can't win.
On a whole I'm getting by okay most days.  Today the heaviness in my eyelids is hitting me hard and it's only 8:30 A.M., but I'll push forward.  Coffee is my lifeline.  What else can I do?  I am seriously frustrated, though. 
 I don't. know. what. to. do.  
I know that he knows exactly what he's doing but how to get Sawyer to just roll over and go back to sleep by himself rather than wake me up is a conundrum.   
Maybe I'll go sleep in the basement.  Or a hotel.

Friday, 2 November 2012


It's Friday.
After two weeks of being back into work-out mode and managing three workouts each week I am realizing that I totally failed this week.  Nothing went as planned this week and by the time the kids were in bed each night I was about as enthusiastic about exercise as cleaning toilets.

have managed to keep my calorie count within reasonable parameters so I suppose that's half the battle.  OK well, actually according to statistics eating properly is 80% of the battle of a healthy weight.  Exercise just feels so much more productive.

I was aimlessly surfing facebook this morning, as I usually do while waiting for my morning coffee to do it's magic, when I came across a post by a former manager I worked under.  He has proudly put up a link here that features his wife as amateur female body builder of the week.  
She is 47.  
Check out the pictures if nothing else.

(I saw her in person at the end of April at a work-related conference and although she has a body to die for she did look a little manly, probably my jealously speaking here... then again, to be in that kind of shape at her age?)

I'm waffling between feelings of complete despair thinking that will be utterly impossible,
 (like, it'll be the day it reaches 30 degrees Celsius here in January before I attain that)
to feelings of hope that hey, I still got time, I'm only 35!
I can't fathom eating the way she does.  Working out - yes, aside from wondering where the time comes from.  But eating....  I know that after awhile your palate changes and a person learns to love what they eat and not 'need' the other flavours.  I enjoy healthy food but to eat over a dozen egg whites a day.....?  I don't actually think it's what she eats it what she doesn't eat.  I feel like I need an indulgence now and then - and a glass of wine!
How about eating out?  Or going to people's houses?  I realize her diet is likely uber strict for training purposes but how would one translate that into something more 'every day'?  
Maybe I don't want what she has bad enough.  Maybe it's a lot to do with my phase in life having little kids?  Or a husband who has zero interest in that kind of thing?  Who knows?!

It does have me thinking, though, as I am currently striving to shed about sixish more pounds.  Gradually of course.

Now excuse me while I go raid my kids Halloween candy!

Wednesday, 31 October 2012

Flower Power

A full body shot of Sierra is on my big camera. So imagine her wearing a matching green skirt with six large leaves circling her waist. Her cuteness always lands her obscene amounts of candy. I'm looking forward to the
candy craziness these next few days!

Tuesday, 30 October 2012


I am coming off of one good night's sleep (yay) and a second mostly good sleep.
So I'm done with the pity party.
Sleep is sooooo integral to a good mood!

I'm enjoying the morning with my kids as a result of decent slumber.
I'm sad that I have to go ear money in less than an hour. (well, not the money part but the earning part)
I wasn't originally scheduled to work today but I got a frantic text from my manger that someone had called in sick, another is away due to a family death aaaaand that leaves them a tad short.  Fortunately my childcare is flexible and Sierra was bribe-able with bubble bath.  They also like going there.
  There's also hope for being able to save for a spring vacation!

Sunday, 28 October 2012

Lagging and Dragging

Well, I'm behind in posting.  
Oh well, can't go back now can I?

I find myself sitting on the couch this late Sunday morning ready to cry.
I am so sleep deprived, frustrated, and still battling a cold that I am on the emotional brink of a torrent of tears.
I think in the past week I have had one uninterrupted night of sleep.  One.  My interrupted sleep hasn't meant a simple wake up and go back to sleep in five minutes once or twice.  No, it has meant being kept awake for two plus hours.  
Night, after night, after night.
And then up by seven.
I'm dying here.
I am to the point where I don't feel like I can take much more of this.
Sawyer has been a little brat at night.  He wakes up for whatever reason and then won't go back to bed.  In my foggy brained state I sit with him in the rocking chair.  That doesn't work.  I've taken him to bed with me, he thrashes about.  I've gone to the couch to spare Trevor and not only does Sawyer still thrash but I hate the couch.  He has also been victimized by a cold but that can't be all.  I think he's gotten in a bad habit and I need to deal with it.

I am fighting the six week cold, I am irritable, impatient, completely void of any compassion, and hugely bitchy.  
I. Am. Tired.

Thursday, 25 October 2012

Why Do I Bother?

House parties for this, that, and the other thing are all over the place these days.  Tupperware, Lia Sopia, Stella and Dot, Scentsy, Epicure, Party Lite... One could go every night for a month and not repeat a company once!

I've been to a fair number of these parties hosted by friends and even purchased stuff.  As sort of a favour I agreed to host two different parties, one I only gave a half-hearted attempt at but the other I actually tried.  You know - for all the parties I have supported and gone to you'd think I'd get a little support?  Nope.  I am quite upset at the whole principal behind it.  I might be able to squeeze out the minimum but even that isn't looking very likely at this point.
I know none of us is rich and able to spend money on more frivolous items but when I also see what they  do spend their money on it annoys me that they can't support me a little.  
Anyway, I must get over it and respect their financial decisions.  But after this experience I. Am. Done. with these kinds of parties.  D.O.N.E.  I'm not going or hosting.


Tuesday, 23 October 2012

Aaand it Begins!

It took Trevor and me over half an hour to shovel ourselves out of our house this morning.
Old Man Winter arrived with a vengeance - over 20cm of snow and still going!  I don't think he's really that old, old people don't have this much strength.

Monday, 22 October 2012

The Good Things

I'm tired and sick and grumpy about it.

- There's nothing like coming home from after a day of slogging the work trenches.  While I'm still driving into the garage the door into the house opens and my two little people come out onto the landing and jump up and down yelling "Mommy, mommy, mommy!!"

- Last Wednesday I had to wake Sierra up in the morning and I crawled up into her loft bed under her blanket.  She stretched and yawned and before her eyes were even opened said "I love you."
- Our first heavy snowfall is expected tonight and it's cold out.  I'm sitting on the couch, in comfy clothes, between my two awesome kids while Barney is on.  (Barney is so not awesome, but the kids are entertained!)
- While snuggling on the couch Sawyer wraps his little arms around me, presses is snotty nose to my cheek while saying : I la-lu mommy! (I love you mommy) 

There are many other good things but those are the ones currently warming my heart and melting the grump!

Sunday, 21 October 2012


Trevor mentioned to me that we are in the back half of October already and I had to check a calendar to validate his statement.  October 21!  
  It doesn't help that this past week has been a complete blur and I'm not sure which way is up at this point.

It all started a week ago Saturday:  We went to Calgary for the day to shop.
Sunday: I think we were actually mostly at home, except for church first thing.  I know there were naps and a trip to the park with the kids.
Monday: I was gone from 8A.M. until 10 P.M. with work and then the Tenore concert.
Tuesday: I was gone from 8A.M., home for an hour over supper and then gone again until 10 P.M.
Wednesday: Gone to women's Bible study in the morning, then chiropractor, then home.  And I stayed home the rest of the day!!! 
Thursday:  Went to a kids' rhyme time in the morning, had a friend and her kids for lunch and a visit.  Rushed off to work at 4P.M. until 8 P.M., had a music practice following work that only got me home at 10P.M.
Friday: A day that began lazy but lurched into high gear with laundry, cleaning, baking, exercise, pizza with my parents and then an evening of cards at a friends house.
Saturday:  Work 9A.M. - 4P.M.  Stop for ice-cream on the way home. Get through supper and prepare for friends to come at 6:30 P.M.  Friends stay until 10:30 P.M
Sunday: After a horrible night with Sawyer I was up for good at 6:45 A.M. and at church by 8A.M.  I helped lead the worship singing and got home at 12:30.  Ate lunch and then crawled into bed for three hours.  Aaaaaaahhh!  Sleep.
Now Trevor is napping for an hour and then we're off to friends/neighbours for deep fried turkey (!) and a different set of friends is coming at 7P.M.!!!!!

We. Are. Crazy.

But it's been fun.

Saturday, 20 October 2012

These Last Fall Days

The warm days are becoming less and less frequent. So we are enjoying what nice weather we can.

Thursday, 18 October 2012

In 15 Minutes

I am sitting in my car in our church parking lot waiting for a music rehearsal. I was half an hour early because I came straight from work which ended at eight. I don't often get time alone in the quiet. It's strangely nice.
Okay, being in a car in a parking lot is not ideal by any means but when one has kids you take what you you can get sometimes!
I just remembered I hadn't posted yet today so you are getting fifteen minutes of randomness.
I started the Insanity workouts again this week after after few months off.
I hurt.
But it also feels good to be back at it. The last few weeks I could feel myself noticeably less in shape. Then with Thanksgiving and other large meal opportunities I could also feel a couple of pounds creeping back on. It was time to get back on control before a problem arose.

After a bitch session at work this evening I decided that I need to let go of an issue regarding hours and fairness etc. if I try and say anything to anyone in charge I'm hooped; it's a lose-lose situation. The only thing left to do is leave it be, take what I have, and if necessary bring it up when my manager is on maternity leave and I don't risk offending her.

Okay. It's time to go in. So long silence and crappy random typing. Hopefully there will be a better post tomorrow!! Thanks for reading.

Wednesday, 17 October 2012

Le Purse

Last January while on vacation in Palm Springs we visited the huge outlet mall a few minutes drive outside the city.  Name brand after name brand shops made up this mall.  

Now, I try not to be too materialistic and worry about name brands and such.  
It's just a name - right? 
Yeah, not always.  I was taken in by all the high-end stores with all the recognizable names and logos adorning their fronts and I drooling..

One particular item that really got me salivating was a Guess purse.  I was totally smitten and strongly coveted this purse.  Sadly, Trevor would not let me pay $100 for a purse.  (all I've ever really had are the $20-$30 JC Penny variety of purse)  The purse stayed and I yearned for it for a long time after, even looking for it in other Guess stores that I happen to visit.  I never did come across another one like it.  Nor did I see a purse of any other brand, be it high end or other, that I liked quite as much.

This past weekend we drove to Calgary to shop, and eat at The Olive Garden.  As I always do since Palm Springs, I walked into Guess to check for the purse - and they had a sale!  A 50% OFF CLEARANCE SALE!!!!!  I not only found a purse but paid only $32 for it, regularly $110!  It's not the purse but I still love it.

I am one happy lady.

So without further ado:

Tuesday, 16 October 2012


I distinctly remember being a teenager, sitting in church, and expelling huge sighs at the dullness of the hymns being sung.
The language was old, and not really English.
The tempo plodding.
The melody very uninteresting.
The emotion lacking.

Why oh why could we not sing praise choruses?
Now those songs had meaning and life. 
Get with the times already!

Yesterday I had the privilege of singing in the choir to back up a group of three tenors called Tenore.  
They were amazing!  
The life and beauty and meaning those men brought to the old familiar hymns brought tears to my eyes.  Who knew the ancient "non-Engligh" words had such depth?
My soul is full.

Sunday, 14 October 2012

Playing Around.

A warm, albeit stinking windy, fall day. We thought we would take the kids out to enjoy it while the opportunity is there.

Friday, 12 October 2012

Friday Night

Yes that's a bottle of wine on the dash of my van.
No it is not open.
We are on our way to share it with friends and I remembered that I had not posted today!

So you get a cheesy photo of Krazy Legz Red, a blend of Merlot and Cab Franc from the Okanagan Valley in BC.

It should be a fun evening!

Thursday, 11 October 2012

Snow Bunny

I have one child who loves to be outside...and another who doesn't. We had our first skiff of snow this morning; just enough for snow angels and foot prints. Sierra was begging to go out at 8 A.M. and I finally relented at 9:15. She could gave stayed out all morning while Sawyer went out for ten minutes than enjoyed the snow from inside!

I miss summer already!

Wednesday, 10 October 2012

Invasion of Oscar

Sometime yesterday Oscar the Grouch invaded me.  I'm not sure where he came from or why he thought he should take over my mood but he did.
Actually, I do have a few ideas as to how the door opened, allowing him to sneak in.
I don't want to talk about it. 

I utilized food therapy instead:
I may or may not have just eaten the left over three pieces of homemade pizza when half that would have done just fine.
 I may have seriously considered Bailey's in my 101st cup of coffee today at only 1 o'clock.  I poured in a good glug of eggnog instead.  (yes, eggnog is in stores already!) 
I may have also eaten two chocolate-chocolate chip cookies with my coffee immediately after scarfing down the three pieces of pizza. 
 To compensate for the negative aspect of food therapy I also may be planning on ferociously cleaning parts of my house, and then exercising this afternoon.  
All this in attempt to eradicate the Oscar mood.

He will disappear!

Tuesday, 9 October 2012


Sawyer is over two and a half years old aaaand.... still in a crib.
I like cribs.
He is forced to stay there if I need him to.
Sierra had been in a bed for well over three months at his age.  But that was out of necessity since her brother was on his way.   Many kids are in a big bed much earlier than mine.  When there's no specific reason it's easy to put off.  Thanks to Sawyer sleeping in a sack he can't climb out.  Although if he really wanted to he could take off the sack and then climb out, but he doesn't!  Mom or Dad always come to his rescue in the morning, or the middle of the night.

He potty trained this past summer and aside from nights he is diaper free and rarely has an accident.  The only reason he is not night trained is because he can't get out of his crib if he has to go so I don't force it.  Then I'm lazy and he wanders around in his diaper for the first couple of hours in the morning (when we don't have to go anywhere) and it's usually soaked by the time I insist on him getting dressed.  Not good. 

This past weekend, the weather was finally cold enough to justify doing inside things.  Operation "move Sawyer into a bed" ensued.  The whole moving Sawyer into a bed is more than just moving him into a bed. 
First we had to paint a garage sale loft bed white for Sierra.  Second, we painted Sawyer's room.  
Third, Sierra's current captain's bed was moved out, and said loft bed was moved in.  She has a dresser with six drawers, Sawyer does not, the captains bed makes more sense for Sawyer to have for the drawer space.  Sierra also has a lot of stuff and the added floor space is also needed.
 Sierra absolutely loves the loft bed.

Then we ran out of time.  Sierra's room is rearranged and awesome.  Sawyer's - whose room was the initial goal! -  is a complete disaster.  Then again, it required way more work.  We intend to add wainscoting, sports-figure silhouette decals and a cool reading corner.  I'm also going to paint a small wooden chest of drawers fire-engine red.  Sawyers room will look awesome too.  Maybe by the end of month.   Maybe in a year.   Pictures will eventually follow!

Monday, 8 October 2012

A Picture of My Morning

Thy sky is overcast, grey and dripping.
My home inside is bright, warm, and cozy.

At exactly 7:11 I heard the patter of Sierra's feet as she got up, used the bathroom and padded her way into our main area.  Our house remained quiet except for the sound of Handy Manny from the TV and Sierra munching on her Nutella sandwhich I had made for her the night before.  On the weekends we make her breakfast and put milk in a cup in the fridge the night before.  Our arrangement is that she watches one show and lets us sleep that little bit longer, provided Sawyer is still sleeping of course!
So at 7:11 A.M. I burrowed under my blanket and hunkered down to enjoy my extra half hour.  It came, and I reluctently emerged to join my daughter.  It was Trevor's turn to sleep in.

It is now 9:15, Bear in the Big Blue House is on the TV.  When it is done the TV will get turned off for the day.  I am sitting at our counter in my flannel PJ pants and matching cotton PJ shirt with a black hoody over top.  I look stellar I'm sure!  An empty coffee cup sits beside the computer.  My daughter is on one side in her flannels doing a bead craft, my son on the other side with his PJ shirt still on but only underwear, backwards, on his bottom half.  Sawyer is insistent on using the toilet by himself  (which I'm not complaining about) and re-dressing is just too complicated.  Hence the backwards underwear.  I'm lucky he has those on!  He is finishing up his breakfast of a grilled cheese sandwich.
Turkey bones from yesterday are already simmering on the stove to be used for savory soups on the cold winter days that are coming.

It is Thanksgiving Monday.  As I observe this morning picture I feel blessed.  My life is normal,ordinary, but it is good!  Very, very good.  I am rich in many ways and I am simply sitting in this moment.  
And loving it!

Sunday, 7 October 2012


My son is a climber. He scrambles up anything and everything and alarms those who are watching. Well, not me anymore but I've gotten kinda used to his monkey skills. Here is a picture of Sawyer not only climbing a closet but doing so in a sleep sack! I just shake my head, then take a picture.

Saturday, 6 October 2012

A Little On Me

I eat one piece of toast with natural peanut butter and either sliced banana or jam nearly every morning.  Although this morning I added a hint of Nutella for a treat!

I'm a coffee snob, no Nabob or Folgers in this house!  Fresh ground beans in a French press, mmmm!

I am about 5' 1 1/2 " and average build.

I love to exercise, it gives me justification to eat.  I'm currently trying figure out a new regime since Sawyer quit napping.

I work part time in the the optical industry.  I have many glasses.

Popcorn is the world's best snack.  Homemade in a special microwave bowl with real butter and salt.

I adore wine.  Especially BC (British Columbia) wine.  

I am a Christian.  I don't preach my beliefs but I don't hide them.

I love a neat and organized house.  Unfortunately the reality of that exists only my dreams! know.

I love to celebrate and have parties.  If my birthday is not carried on for at least a week I'm sad.  My daughter echoes my sentiments in this area!

I enjoy baking anything from cookies to cake to bread.  I suck at decorating with icing so they usually don't look so pretty.  But, hey, they taste good.

I also cook.  We rarely eat out or eat premade food.

I'm a total recipe follower in all cooking/baking.  No playing around or experimenting for me!

It's Canadian Thanksgiving this weekend.  I'm hosting my family (9 of us).  It' been years since I cooked a turkey, my mom always does it.  Strangely, I'm not nervous.

I love my life!

Friday, 5 October 2012

A Fetish

I've been in the eyeglass industry for fourteen years.  I have a little problem!

As the bus drove away...

As I watched my little girl's school bus - with my little girl on it! - drive away on Monday a little unexpected knot formed in my throat.
Sierra began kindergarten this year and at first it didn't bother me one bit.  Last year she went to preschool two afternoons a week and with kindergarten her time away simply increased to two full days.  No problem right?  Yeah.  No.  Simply put, due to a strange September schedule I really felt her absence as I basically didn't see her for the first three days of the week! 
How quickly it changes.  Every parent says it, I knew it, but until it happens one doesn't quite grasp the speediness with which one's child slips away from them in daily life.  My mind is being blown away, and in one short year she'll will be away from me every week day.  It's not just school either that is taking her from me - she is asking to play outside by herself (sans parents!) with her brother or the neighbour kids.  She amuses herself more and more without nagging me to constantly play with her too.  And it will continue I'm sure.

I'm fortunate that I could mostly stay home these past five years.  I can honestly say that I d0 my best to enjoy each stage of my kids lives (well, not the tantrums get the idea!), not wishing it forward or yearning to rewind.  Sierra is becoming so much fun as she grows, able to do more and more.  For example, she did a 1.4 km hike that had a 200m elevation increase this summer - and was super proud of herself!  

In anticipation of this different schedule, I promised myself that the days Sierra is home I would deliberately engage in playing with my kids.  I truly love being around them and believe they are a gift to be cherished.  Of course, as all mom's will likely concur, there are days...oh there are days!  

 Sierra's little brother is still around which is good.  It's crazy how easy one kid actually is!  Being the second child though, Sawyer naturally is more independent, which helps me get stuff done.  Interestingly enough, though, he is less self-sufficient when his sister is away.  He can do whatever he wants without getting screeched at but I can tell he also feels a little lost without another kid around.  

So we all adjust. 
At least Sierra didn't just hop on the bus with a flippant "by Mom!" the first time.  It was a process of riding with her the whole way and then part way and then bribing her to go alone.  Oh, and Sierra still doesn't ride home on the bus!

Tuesday, 2 October 2012

A Polish(ed) Tale

I have a girly girl, Sierra, who loves to paint her nails.  We used to have our little spa time during her young brother's nap almost once a week.  It was fun.  Well, Sawyer quit napping this summer so we've had to do our manicures with him around.  On one particular nail day she painted her nails, closed up all the polish and left it on the kitchen table.  I went to have a shower and get ready for my evening work shift.  For some reason I decided to clean to bathroom while I was in there and took a little longer than usual.

After about a half an hour Sierra came running in yelling that "Sawyer had  nail polish everywhere!!!" 
I threw on a robe and ran into the main area and...

 See the long green trail from left to right?  Yeah.
He dropped the bottle of polish.
It splattered in a long line.

And yes, that is a hardwood floor.

See the pink all over the chair?
He had decided to paint his toe nails and this is the result.

Sierra also stepped in a small spot and managed to get green smears in random places on her way to my bathroom. 

Nail polish does not simply wipe off.  The word on the 'net is to use hairspray and a lot of elbow grease.  Hairspray, reportedly, softens it enough to scrape off without damaging the finish.  
I've spent three hours on it and got maybe a quarter done.
And my house reeks of hairspray.
And my floor is getting some new scratches from scraping.


I am not impressed.

After scouring and cursing with minimal progress one afternoon, I called and asked Trevor to check for acetone-free nail polish remover in search of an easier way.   He complied.  Readily.  I must have growled in frustration pretty good! We tested an inconspicuous spot....with no noticeable dulling of the finish


Nearly all the polish is now removed without also removing the floor finish.

My son will not have to find another home now.
(I kid!)

Sawyer is not called Captain Destruction without reason!

Shoes! I Love Shoes!

Aren't these purdy?


My mom and dad just spent two glorious weeks cruising and touring Italy and Greece.Prior to their departure I asked my mom to bring me back some Italian leather shoes.

Apparently Italian leather is a wee bit on the expensive side but these babies were on sale so my mom bought them instead. 
 I am totally in love with them!

 Oh and they are COM-FY!  I wore them all day at work last Monday with nary a sore spot.

I'm sad the weather is turning cold, if for no other reason than these shoes will be difficult to wear in the snow!

Monday, 1 October 2012

31 Days

For the third year in a row I've become a sucker for punishment a challenge and signed up for something called NaBloWriMo.  In short, write a post every day for the month of October.


I've recently reentered the blogging world after a deviation from truly expressing myself in my writing.  This gradually resulted in a noticeable lack of blogging.   I've come back to me and writing the way I want to and used to, so I think getting back into it on a daily basis is just what I need!

I know this is a totally lame first day post but after working all day Saturday my wonderful husband whisked me away on an overnight mountain getaway - without kids - as my birthday present (which was last week).  Upon returning Sunday, we all had supper together and then did a little cake ceremony - complete with candles and singing.  My actual birthday was insanely busy with what we call our life so we'd not had the chance to ''properly'" celebrate.  My five year old daughter believes birthdays must have a cake and candles and singing to effectively qualify as having been celebrated.

Then it was the usual pack up, get home, unpack, do the bedtime thing, prepare for the week ahead which left little time for a fantastic October 1st blog post.  Which, by the way, is actually being written on Sunday night as I know Monday does not contain a spare minute.

Thanks for joining me on this adventure - we'll see how I do!

Thursday, 27 September 2012

35 and Tired

Could it be the cold I've been fighting for two weeks? 

Could it be that the night is rare where one or the other child does not rouse me from blissful slumber at some point?

Could it be the adjustment to getting up and being ready by 8 A.M. three mornings in a row where it used to be a necessity for only one? 

Could it be the overall adaptation to fall scheduling?

Could it be the later rising/earlier setting sun?

Could it be my diet?

Could it be from the complete absence of exercise as a result of said cold?

Could it be that I've officially reached my mid-thirties?

Could it be a combination of all of the above?

 What? You might ask.  Or might not but I'm going to tell you anyway!

Oh that I am impossibly tired and fatigued these days.  It is all I can do to get through my days lately.  If caffeine could go in an IV drip I'd sign up.  Now.  Caffeine is only a temporary, artificial fix though.  I know that aside from my cold I am technically very healthy, I just had my physical and was given a big thumbs up.  I think the sluggish feeling is everything catching up to my poor body and there is just no opportunity to take the time to recover.  A mom never gets the chance to be sick; to lay in bed or on the couch and watch daytime TV and allow whatever is plaguing her to run its course and get on out.  Nope.  A mom is Mom 24/7.  Not that I'd trade it...

I'll get through this.

I get a night away in a beautiful, local mountain park with just my hubby this weekend as my birthday present.  That should help!

Monday, 24 September 2012


Last February, upon complete frustration with our finances, I threw up my hands and accepted the fact that we were where we were and there wasn't much I could do to change it.  It made no sense for me to try and work more due to child care costs, there were no teaching jobs (or other jobs) available for Trevor, and the odds of winning the lottery or successfully planting a money tree weren't in our favour!   We were living comfortably but our opportunities to save for much more just weren't there.  Oh Trevor and I had plans for our yard and for travel and for our house and for....but aside from maxing out our credit cards there simple wasn't the means to carry out these plans.  A door closed.

This past May, as I sighed and resigned myself to the fact that Trevor would likely never get a job as a teacher and actually let go of my dream for him/us relating to that, I saw a door close.
One Sunday morning, also in May, as I listened to the choir and the worship team, both of which I used to be a part of and love, I realized that door had closed too.

I volunteered to lead a women's Bible study group this fall, having done so year ago, but the need was not there and in early August I saw that door also close.

My babysitter for Sawyer told me at the beginning of August that she would no longer be able to watch him on Mondays while I went to work.  Slam!

Seeing all those doors close is little disheartening to say the least.  Life was getting a little boring and mundane, I felt like I had no purpose or direction.  But deep down I knew that God was allowing this for a reason so I've been watching and waiting for new doors to open.

As September threatened to arrive, signifying the end of summer, I delved into our care group study book entitled "Unstuck" by Arnie Cole and Michael Ross.  It's about how to get out of the rut life likes to settle us into by re-engaging in the Word or God; the Bible. 

As soon as I began centering myself with Jesus Christ again, I began to feel calmer and more focused in life.  I also began to see doors crack open.

I found a great Christian lady with a four year old daughter, in town, to watch Sawyer - and Sierra when needed - at a super reasonable rate.  Open door.

My work expressed their need to have me work an additional day a week.  With less expensive, local childcare it was actually a doable option.  Beginning in October I will be working more outside the home.  (I say that because I know being a stay-at-home mom is work!)  Extra work equals extra money which means I can dream a little again of extras.  Another door opening.

I recently emailed our worship pastor about opportunities for involvement in the worship aspect of our church and it appears there may be a spot for me on a regular worship team!  The handle is turning on this one but not quite open yet.

Many people are getting beaten down as fall programing and schedules are launching into full swing but not me.  I'm excited and motivated as my life is moving forward in a positive way.